This made me laugh an unreasonable amount. I needed this after everything. Thank you.

This may seem basic, but I think some people really need it. I have a hard time remembering things like birthdays and such. So I make sure to add people’s birthdays into their contact info on my phone. Then it will show up on my calendar as a different color and I can see it coming up and actively try to be on top of it instead of it passing and feeling guilty for forgetting. Maybe you don’t care about everyone’s birthday in your life, but I at least try to add my friends and family so I can reach out to them or try to remember to send a gift to little ones that are far away, etc.

As much as it was sad to see a lot of restaurants die during COVID, there were an awful lot of sushi abomination restaurants out there that I think we’re all better off without. I actually had to stop eating sushi for a few years because we would try to order sushi and it would just be disgusting. You’d get either 1 of 2 scenarios - it was some very gimmicky sushi that you’d never eat more than once, or it was gross because the quality just wasn’t up to par during lockdown. And sushi is unfortunately one of those foods that’s very unforgiving and if you have even 1 bad experience, you won’t be going back to that establishment. So I can see why a lot of them closed.

Since nobody actually answered the question: Menards is a massive hardware store chain in the Midwest. When I say it’s massive, it has everything you could ever need in a hardware store and more. Like there are usually multiple floors, a lumber yard, highly specialized sections, and even a small grocery section with food, pet supplies, clothing, etc. it’s definitely the greatest hardware store ever conceived, but unfortunately the man who owns them is batshit crazy in classic Wisconsin fashion.

Don’t forget that eggs also come out the hole!! If you’ve ever seen fresh farm eggs before, you have to wash them before you use them because they’re covered in piss and shit. Yum!

There’s an excellent episode of the Sopranos where they end up going to Italy. And even though their whole personality is “Italian” they find that they have nothing in common with actual Italians. That show is a masterpiece.

It says posted 18 years ago, but I’m pretty sure this predates YouTube even. Now I feel old… gross.

I’m disabled!!

Agreed. Rollerblading is very 90s.

One story my husband shared with me was when he and my dad stopped into a local bar after working hard on home renovations all day. They planned to get some dinner and have some beer after a hard day’s work but needed to wash their very dirty hands first. So they went back into the bathroom and washed their hands. Well apparently that was too “gay” for the owner of the bar and they went over to the bathroom and started saying things like “I don’t know what you think you’re doing in there” and “I just need to make sure you’re not doing anything funny”. So they ended up just leaving while the guy yelled at them saying they had to buy something.

A slightly different version of this concept also happened to my husband. At one point, 2 of our lady friends were talking about fashion and my husband, who is MUCH more fashionable than I am, chimed in. They proceeded to tell him that he’s “not allowed to have an opinion because he’s a man” which is the most double standard bullshit I’ve ever heard come out of any of my friends mouths. It’s stuck with me for a long time now because I think it keeps me honest with myself about standards and reminds me to think about how opinions change when you flip genders.

While I’m not fully on board with this idea, I do think it could help some people out. When I got my first job out of college, I definitely couldn’t afford to live anywhere aside from my parents house. All my friends were in the same boat and even with our meager salaries together, we could not afford to get an apparent together. It took us 3-4 years out of college to have the salary to be able to come together and get an apartment. But what if you moved to a new place and don’t have friends to share with? What if you just… Don’t have friends or have some reason you can’t live with others? This is a great solution for that. My brother was in a situation recently where he felt stuck in a relationship with his batshit crazy girlfriend because he couldn’t afford to be on his own and would have to move in with our parents if they broke up. It eventually worked out and he has an apartment all his own, but I feel he could have removed himself from that relationship sooner if there was a cheap option like this for him to use temporarily.

My choices are AT&T and Comcast. Both are shitty and treat you equally shitty, but Comcast actually works most of the time ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I used to fly united quite a bit and it used to be pretty good. But these days my options for flying for work are united, delta, and southwest and I usually choose delta because they don’t charge you for shit and you can have both an overhead carry on and a small bag plus free internet on the plane. In the end they’re all shit, but I’m going to pick the lesser of the shits each time. Same reason I have Comcast internet.

I’ve been taking a video game break to play more board games. Zoo Vadis has been a top pick lately and I highly recommend.

And then there’s you did everything you possibly could yourself and you did your best and saved tons of money, but now you actually do need to pay someone to do the thing you don’t trust yourself to do so you saved money just for the thing, but no contractor will agree to come do the thing because demand is high and they would rather do commercial projects. So yeah… You can’t even pay a pro and you’re just fucked 🤷

We still have one in Illinois but I’m not sure how it’s still holding on. Used to love going in there. Loads of specialized parts and equipment as well as staff that were super knowledgeable and helpful. But at least we have Microcenter now… Which is like if you took a Fry’s and scaled it down and made it work more like a car dealership 😭😭😭

When I was a kid, my mom either bought or was gifted a little plush snowman that would say “Happy holidays! Happy holidays!” When you squeezed it. It would maybe get squeezed a few times in December and then put in a bin until the following year. No one ever changed the batteries and it still worked each year for many years. Then it started to run out of juice. And slowly over each year it would sound more and more demonic, but it always played at least once before running out of power. It’s now been more than 25 years and we still check it each year to see if the demonic snowman is still alive. I’m not sure it will ever die if it was never alive in the first place…

This.

I KNOW WHOOOO I WANT TO TAKE ME HOME

First sentence: wow I absolutely agree. It’s such a shame that mothers have to go back to work so soon after giving birth. We should work toward guaranteeing parental time off for all parents.

Second sentence: yeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaah… Um… Nevermind.