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Joined 1 year ago
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Cake day: June 22nd, 2023

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  • Secondhand nicotine does you no harm. The reason cigarettes are so bad for you is that you’re smoking tar. That’s what makes the walls of a smokers home yellow, and what gives them cancer.

    Nicotine is addictive, but largely harmless at the levels in cigarettes and vapes for the primary smoker. A secondhand smoker will be getting almost nothing. The problem with vapes is, I suspect, the flavourings. I’m aware of mounting evidence that they’re not harmless, but I think that’s only to primary vapers, not secondary.







  • If you really want to give it one last chance before leaving my advice would be to have a 1-on-1 talk with her.

    Start out by saying that:

    • You understand that she works in a different way to you.
    • You feel more secure when your private and work lives are separate.
    • You feel you are able to do your best work when you can focus on the task without distraction.

    “Feel” is an important word here. You’re not trying to be confrontational. You’re trying to express your position so she can understand you and how you work better. You’re trying to show her the right way to manage you, rather than pointing out the wrong way.

    Then ask a couple of questions:

    • Does she want you to communicate more because she’s worried that you’re not communicating issues that she needs to be aware of in her role? If so, that’s a valid concern. Maybe organise a fixed time each week to discuss such issues so you can plan for it and come prepared.

    • Does she think she can accommodate how you like to work?

    I expect she values “openness” but that doesn’t need to be sharing your whole life with the people you work with. So meet her half-way, be open about what you’re working on and the problems you’re facing. She may be able to help you by resolving your dependencies on others, or getting you what you need.