I’m going to say “I hope we don’t get off on the wrong foot” and then they’re going to ask me to leave.

People with foot fetish: ｡⁠◕⁠‿⁠◕⁠｡

I’d think the bed was ugly, but I wouldn’t say a damn thing. I’d just use those big toes for leverage.

Have demented sex

Obviously I would look past all the positive attributes my crush has and never see them again. Following my retreat I would then begin to evaluate everyone elses taste while placing my own above them. Naturally, they would all fall short aswell and I will seclude myself entirely. Then I will become frustrated that I have no strong connections with anyone because they are beneath me and no one understands my greatness.

All because I couldn’t see that that bed was funky and cool in a weird way.

I want to leave, but the doors are already sealed. Suddenly I hear a faint voice next to my ear: “Take off your socks”

First I sit at the foot of the foot bed.

It’s a little bothersome that be toes don’t touch the ground

If I was red foreman I’d ask if they ever shoved a foot up their ass.

apologize. not everyone’s kinks are universal and feet aren’t my thing, and my feet lol… sometimes they’re well groomed but on average tend toward goblin toes.

I’d get real anxious about not having had time to tidy up my toenails.

I would feel defeeted

I’m frog leaping the big toes for a grand entrance.

I guess I’m getting a footjob, idk

Maybe discuss that it’s anatomically questionable, the testosterone morphism of the toe lengths aside it also has all toes curled except for the big toe: despite having very capable feet myself I cannot do that and I’m not sure other people can.

In a word, “sploosh”