Also, the Jewish God and Muslim Allah are on the International Space Station.

  • LifeBandit666@feddit.uk
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    11 months ago

    Satan wins again. At this point the Christians have to admit they chose the losing side.

    I mean this God of theirs is shit, can’t even get around satellites, didn’t think humans might beat their cocks raw despite seeing it constantly in Human 1.0 (Chimps), or that they might eat fish on a Tuesday or whatever. Even Jesus was fucking a whore and he was God incarnate.

    Also God invented Cancer.

    • GNU Dude@lemmy.world
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      11 months ago

      Jesus fucking a prostitute. I’m interested. Never read the bible so I don’t know about it, but I’m curious.

      • prole@sh.itjust.works
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        11 months ago

        Mary Magdalene. It’s never explicitly stated in the canonical Bible (as if that means anything), but they were very close.

        • Flax@feddit.uk
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          11 months ago

          She was just one of His many followers, it’s quite an absurd speculation. Also doesn’t say that she was a prostitute anywhere.

          • prole@sh.itjust.works
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            11 months ago

            True. If only the was more than one story from his life between being a child, and being in his 30s… Oh well I guess we’ll just have to assume he lived as a monk and denied himself of anything pleasurable 🙄

            Though I recently learned that there is a book about it, it’s just that it wasn’t chosen to be “canonical,” and therefore means you can ignore it completely? Curiously, Jesus does some really fucked up things in that book, including showing off his powers, and killing people just to bring them back to life. The Infancy Gospel of Thomas is the book btw.

            Who gets to decide that book isn’t true but the rest are?

            • Flax@feddit.uk
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              11 months ago

              The infancy Gospel of Thomas was written well over one hundred years after Jesus had already left earth, in the second century. It claimed that Jesus performed random frivolous miracles for fun, when the Gospel of John said that the water to wine miracle was the first. We also don’t know who “Thomas the Israelite” is either.

              It’s likely just something someone made up to try and give a narrative for Jesus’ childhood.

              Jesus also likely cast the demons out of Mary Magdalene while in His thirties. Jesus wouldn’t need a female partner if He actually was truly God.

              • prole@sh.itjust.works
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                11 months ago

                When were Matthew, Mark, Luke and John written?

                Here, let me save you a quick Google:

                The Gospel of Mark probably dates from c. AD 66–70, Matthew and Luke around AD 85–90, and John AD 90–110. Despite the traditional ascriptions, all four are anonymous and most scholars agree that none were written by eyewitnesses.

                Oh look at that.

                after Jesus had already left Earth

                Lol ok bud. Whatever delusion makes you happy.

                • Flax@feddit.uk
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                  11 months ago

                  What are you trying to prove? The infancy gospel of thomas was written likely around 180AD and even then, people were already calling it out as being a fake.

                  You clearly aren’t looking for an open-minded discussion by calling me “delusional”, anyway.

                  • prole@sh.itjust.works
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                    11 months ago

                    Imagine using such a piss poor method of finding truth for literally anything in your life besides religion.

                    Would you consider me delusional if I told you that I have an invisible dragon in my garage, and that he’s died several times, and has returned to Earth after each time?

            • Flax@feddit.uk
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              11 months ago

              If it was a biblical fact, you could give me details by giving me biblical references, not a french fiction novel 😂