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These people don’t even read their own literature. The Catholic church’s ban on alchemy is about falsely claiming something is a valuable metal in order to pay for debts. It has nothing to do with the occult – the ban was because it’s a sin to lie / cheat / steal. A saint is even on record saying that alchemical gold is ok if the end if product is real gold.
With that context, of course God doesn’t give a shit if you use SQLAlchemy as long as you aren’t using it to defraud people. If you were defrauding people, it wouldn’t matter what tool you used.
.
I’m shocked that a person who thinks the name of a piece of software can harm them doesn’t understand their own religion.
I mean, these are the same people who won’t watch Big Bang Theory because the title is heretical, or believe that playing Magic the Gathering or Pokemon TCG are literally summoning demons and spirits into the world, or who believe that playing D&D is doing the same. Rationality is not exactly their strong suit.
I mean they did ‘read a book’ and it became the real world to them
Lol, yeah, that is exactly how The Bible works for them.
Yeah they should not watch Big Bang theory for the same reasons as the rest of us. …Because of the shitty writing.
If you were defrauding people, it wouldn’t matter what tool you used.
Stays silent while coding the JezuzLovezU worm…
Jesus, he knows me, and he knows I’m right
Now of course one could make some damning argument about the state of the tech industry in practice, resulting in one of those bell curve memes with “using SQLalchemy is a sin” on both far sides and “noooo it’s just a name it’s fine there’s no fraud involved” in the middle
God would have to exist to give any shits at all
Well, god generally doesn’t give a shit at all if he exists, so there’s that.
And here i thought they banned alchemy because they learned from a copper trader.
The user shouldn’t code in Python. That’s a fucking serpent. It caused Eve to eat the apple. Original sin. Holy shit, the most popular coding language is from the fucking devil! Mask off, mind blown, what the eff.
On that note, I sure hope he doesn’t uses any Apple products either.
TL;DR The fruit of the tree of knowledge being a literal apple is non-canon, being entirely based on a pun.
The word “apple” is not used in the Bible, that is, unless the Bible in question is a translation that specifically uses that word. Even then, see below.
The whole apple thing comes from:
- the fact that the word for “apple” can be used as a synonym for “(any) fruit” in some languages and context, and so could mean any fruit.
Think about French pomme de terre for “potato” which is literally “apple (meaning ‘fruit’) of the earth”. Dutch has aardappel (earth apple) which is the same thing. Fun fact: Old English eorþæppel (earth apple) allegedly meant “cucumber”. Go figure. But I digress.
- Latin is the main ecclesiastical language for one particularly influential branch of Christianity and one word for apple in Latin is “malus”. That sounds like a lot of unrelated Latin words that start “mal-” that mean bad or evil, thus an apparent connection to the fruit of the tree of knowledge also leading to evil.
(I mean, it might actually be a proto-apple of some sort (modern apples did not exist 7000 years ago or whenever it was supposed to be) but the Bible doesn’t specify.
Some scholars think that the whole thing developed out of metaphor for abandoning a hunter-gatherer lifestyle for farming. Others think that it might be a reference to beer / alcohol, which is one of the first things humans got interested in after farming.)
Latin also used apple as a stand-in for generic fruit, cf. malum persicum (“Persian apple”) meaning peach.
And, fun fact, the English word “pineapple” was originally synonymous with “pinecone” (i.e. the fruit of the pine tree).
I mean, that Apple logo has a bite out of it. Eve’s bite! And it ships with Python!
Someone call the Inquisition!
I was genuinely taught by my churh not to use apple products for this exact reason. The youth leaders went on a whole tangent about the symbolism. They thought Apple, the company, was trying to trick us all into satanism.
It was a little bit like that video of the lady preaching about Monster energy drinks. Oh, and you better believe they showed us all that video unironically.
But c’mon, at least Monster is supposed to be edgy. Apple is literally just an apple. Insanity, I tell you
Well I’m pretty sure that is the symbolism they were using, and either implying it gives your freedom or knowledge, I assume the former. It’s a pretty good symbol if you agree that eating the theoretical apple is actually a good thing.
That’s a cool way to look at it! I got curious so I looked it up, and I found an interview with the guy who designed the logo, and he said it’s a myth.
Of course, I’ll add that there might be more to the story than that. IIRC the name was chosen before the logo, so this doesn’t rule out that the name itself was a reference to the bible story. Also, if it was, I kinda doubt that Apple would openly confirm it now, knowing it could cause them to lose some of their customers. 🤷
Isn’t the story, nobody came up with a good name for the company and Steve Jobs said you have x days to come up with a name I like, or I just call it Apple? And they didn’t?
Python is actually named after Monty Python’s Flying Circus, so it isn’t a serpent. It is so much worse.
The python in monty python does refer to the snake.
it doesn’t refer to anything, they picked a silly name they were confident no real person had.
Snakes are inherently evil! Don’t even LOOK at one or breathe an oxygen atom that’s ever touched the tongue of a snake!
#SayingTheQuietPartOutLoud
Computer programmers are the devil.
They do some sorcery
It must be exhausting to go through life saddled with so much mental bullshit.
Not surprising considering Catholicism scores quite high on the BITE model for cults.
The thing about mental bullshit is that it’s invisible to the person who’s got it.
So look in the mirror now and then.
If it was invisible then they wouldn’t be asking this question
Look in the mirror for something invisible?
import SQLAlchemy as SQLJesusProblem solved
That’s taking the LORD’s name in vain which, according to Catholicism, is considered blasphemy which is literally THE single worst type of sin you can commit. See you in the 9th circle!
is it? I checked the dictionary and it doesn’t seem like they’re doing anything in vain. https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/vain
- having or showing undue or excessive pride in one’s appearance or achievements : conceited
it’s literally the opposite of pride. they’re using his name to hide something they’re ashamed of
- marked by futility or ineffectualness : unsuccessful, useless vain efforts to escape
also the opposite, they’re trying to use his name in an effective manner to solve a problem
- having no real value : idle, worthless vain pretensions
same as the previous, it would have a worth to them
- archaic : foolish, silly
again, they’re using it for schoolwork, which is educated, not foolish
Not religious nor an expert on this, but as far as I know:
“Taking the Lord’s Name in Vain” is the technical term in Christianity for using words that refer to God/Jesus in any context that isn’t directly referring to them, which is considered a form of blasphemy. The majority of Christians, Catholics especially, believe that even expressions like “oh my god!” or exclaiming “Jesus!” when surprised constitute taking the Lord’s name in vain, or as is what is happening here, where you use Jesus for something unrelated to him. And the bible does make it very clear that blasphemy is worse than literally any other sin.
I think there are more rules, too. I think you’re not allowed to swear (wherever that comes from). And there are restrictions/superstitions(?) put on other names. I don’t think christians speak out Satan / Beelzebub. Probably because calling their name conjures a deamon or people said names have some power to them.
more like SQLCrusader
Alchemy isn’t even a strictly occult thing. It was something done in the medieval era that was basically a very early form of science before most of the things they were trying to do were considered impossible
If Jesus really turned water into wine then what would you call that if not alchemy?
That was just good BYOB manners.
I mean alchemy is an occult practice. It’s just history only pays attention to the physical aspects (turning things into gold, etc). Often times the medium to turn a substance into gold is called the philosophers stone
But this is only a portion of it. The philosophers stone in alchemy is actually spiritual enlightenment or becoming one with everything. Hence the concept of turning anything into gold, gold being enlightenment and the universe and the plain material before the transformation is preenlightened individuals. They all become the same (one, gold) after attaining it.
Most alchemical philosophy is occult/spiritual and the chemistry aspects are a metaphor for the evolution of the soul.
I think because modernity is mostly materialist in its philosophy that we ignore the underlying spirituality associated with alchemy
“science”… That’s just a road to hell with extra steps.
And, to the extent that it was occult, it was typically biblical occultism. There was a big emphasis on the wisdom of Solomon in particular.
The church did frown upon it at the time, if I recall. For example, Newton spent years on alchemy yet that’s forgotten
Glad he didn’t overdose on alchemy
Better not tell them about daemons I guess.
From the title of the screenshot I was sure it was going to be about daemons.
Or about the D.E.V.I.L.S. format listing option on ffmpeg
Or FreeBSDs mascot
This person is really gonna hate my new web framework “I submit to the horned lord, Lucifer, the light bringer and ruler of this world. All hail Satan.”
I think it’s gonna be big since it’s the only web framework for Malbolge.
I don’t understand how you wrote a framework in Malbolge, but chances are good that you don’t either.
Lucifer and Satan aren’t the same entity.
These are titles not names
It’s OK. I’m making a joke, not calling the corners… Though I guess this could be sort of a ward for a software community, but I think it wouldn’t have to be any kind of accurate to work given the entity it’s keeping out.
Depends on how you interpret the Golden Age text. But you’re correct that the former is the light bringer and the latter is adversary/legal opponent.
But the silver age crap messed with that canon.
My head canon is that Lucifer was a member of the Q Continuum while Satan was a misunderstood Time Lord.
The Pope needs to have a sit-down with the folks at Disney to learn how to properly manage a shared imaginary universe.
Bro, you’re not in high school anymore. No one is impressed that you threw a fit when Mom took you to church that one time.
Also I wouldn’t get Disney’s help for a shared imaginary universe, considering the Marvel Cinematic Universe was cool, but it’s been going on too long, none of the shows are any good.
It really should have ended it end game, because it just feels like every movie now is just build up for a different thing, and the only part of it anyone cares about anymore is what Spider-Man meme are they going to do?
I was sexually assaulted multiple times at multiple churches.
Fuck you and fuck your trivializing.
Yet they say “Easter Eggs”, referring to a Pagan tradition. As hypocritical as it gets.
My favorite thing about the “easter egg” he specifically mentions is that Alembics are still used in chemistry to this day. They are just a way to condense vaporized gasses and collect them.
I mean, the largest denomination of Christianity ^(Catholicism) is overrun with pedophiles. The whole thing is obviously bullshit.
Based on the comments in here, this joke went over many heads… Does not want to use a tool called Alchemy, but has tried one called Peewee, as in using Peewees in catholic church is ok (Peewees is referred to kids in amateur sports between 12-13 years of age)
Peewees is referred to kids in amateur sports between 12-13 years of age
that’s probably the missing piece of information for most ^^’
I just skimmed this but shouldn’t people who are unable/ubwilling to live in the modern world be true to themselves and also not code in some demonic language?
Just skip it and piss off dear catholic
Wait until they learn about daemons
Even the real daemons are just spirits it’s the Christians who literally demonized them.
The idiocy goes back more than a millenium.
If Christians are idiots then so are the “pagans”, religion is religion. Don’t defend one because you hate another.
it’s easier to find obvious faults when something is held close for examination. Shoving this one in our faces has given us greater opportunity for close study. Other brands of hokum may include an actual space ship to rocket the most a faithful away or a con man who this one final time miraculously went straight, rituals with one rolled pant-leg, or alien spirits living in volcanoes. But we don’t talk about them so much as they keep their weirdness in the shadows.
Aight I recognize most of those, who’s the pant leg?
Removed by mod
Exactly
No not really, Christianity is full of contradictions that cannot be reconciled and has a hard line book they must follow (filled with said contradictions). Paganism, as a belief structure, was essentially buried so individuals are working of off their own ideas that can be as varied as the practitioners (afaik, I’m not a neo pagan). Christianity isn’t bad because you have to believe on something, no matter what the reddit atheist will tell you, it’s bad because of what you have to believe.
I’m sure all those sites of human sacrifice and other barbarity don’t really exist and were really those evil Christians. Neopagans are aping religions that were rarely peaceful, I mean how many war gods did the Norse peoples alone have?
So, you a reddit atheist or an idiot?
Agnostic more or less, I just despise unfair double standards
I had a crazy Catholic prepper neighbor way back in '99 (she was the hipster of preppers, one of the things she railed about was all the people prepping just for y2k when she had already been doing it for years, but that’s another story) and one of her things was how evil bill gates was- so I told her Linux was evil-er because of the daemons. Gave her a lot to think about.
Does that command refer to the His Dark Materials thing? I thought regular demons were spelt without the a, but maybe it’s an old spelling.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Daemon_(computing)
The term was coined by the programmers at MIT’s Project MAC. According to Fernando J. Corbató, who worked on Project MAC in 1963, his team was the first to use the term daemon, inspired by Maxwell’s demon, an imaginary agent in physics and thermodynamics that helped to sort molecules, stating, “We fancifully began to use the word daemon to describe background processes that worked tirelessly to perform system chores”.[2] Unix systems inherited this terminology. Maxwell’s demon is consistent with Greek mythology’s interpretation of a daemon as a supernatural being working in the background.
Just wait until they learn about Daemons
And killing children.
Master/slave systems are probably a-ok for them though.
The only reason killing children is bad in their view would be if the child is unborn/not spawned already or if they want to abuse it but can’t anymore.
And spawning a zombie process.
That’s actually sacred.
They’d probably be fine with that as long as they’re not unborn
Would deleting an executable file without running it be equivalent to an abortion? Or is it more like contraception? Either way some religions ban both of those
And detaching/reattaching git heads.
This man probably hesitates to pick up a screwdriver when assembling IKEA furniture
It’s for the best we wouldn’t want him to hurt himself.
Don’t we all?
Phillips heads have a cross on it, and you probably shouldn’t use a cross like that so they’re a no-go. Jesus was nailed to the cross, so using nails is bad. You better be safe and just not drive anything into wood for that matter…
The sinful tools with occult names work. I think that should be a big pointer here.
Witchcraft is not only common in the tech world, its nessecary.
You ever install a server into a rack? Its impossible not to slice your finger a little bit. Thats because the tech gods require a blood sacrifice.
Code is just spells, carefully crafted to bind and control the spirits of the machine.
Vim is an actual demon, summoned and dismissed by the use of mysterious ancient runes.
Magic smoke is real.
I got that reference.
Just fork it and name it something else.
Religions have been doing this for millenia.
I hearby excumicate myself from the religion of c++ to start the far superior religion of c#. All those who remain with that heathonistic static class oriented language shall burn in the pits of compiler hell.
Send in the ASM knights.
Know what else is forked? A snake’s tongue. Like the one that made Eve eat the apple. Heresy!
How about SQLeviticus or HolyGraiSQL?
S(i)QL: Spanish Inquisition query language
this is called heresy (until it gets popular enough)
Sire, we’ve found a witch! May we burn her?
This post was a joke but I once had a woman scream at me for an hour that her account number had 666 in the middle of it. She was extremely upset that nobody warned her about this. She wanted a new account AND a refund for the entire time that the “sinful” account was active.
I should mention that her account was 15 years old at the time. The number never changed during that time it was always the same. She screamed so long and hard that they gave her a credit that essentially covered an entire year of service. I hate it here 😀
My ex wife did that with a new bank account years ago with 666 in it. I don’t recall her screaming at anyone, but, it was embarrassing , nonetheless, to watch her go around and around with a banker on the issue.
America needs a reboot
