• Allonzee@lemmy.world
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    3 months ago

    I always find it peculiar and proof of self-hatred that humans are so averse and judgemental about reveling in our sexuality.

    It’s a major part of who we all are, whether we choose to deny that or not. Cultures and world religions always run by monied interests would prefer we spend our time miserable collecting more for their dragon hoard piles as they live in hyper-decadent debauchery, and most of us have been too fucked in the head with sexual and “don’t be laaaazy” shame to be fixable, but humanity would have been so much happier if we spent less time sacrificing ourselves to the God of economic metastasis and more time fucking, especially in an age of birth control.

    We might not even have put ourselves on the express lane to self-extinction we’re currently careening down in search of more treasure for the masters.

    • Rooskie91@discuss.online
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      3 months ago

      Sex is free, fun, and everyone can do it. We can’t have that in capitalism, why would people work for money?

    • interdimensionalmeme@lemmy.ml
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      3 months ago

      This isn’t coming from the self, our culture is extremely anti human, anti sexuality (the major cause of human)

      Discussion of sexuality is grounds for erasure in most spheres of society. When sexuality is permitted to be depicted, it is almost always in a negative condemning light similar to how’s drugs are discussed.

      The only valid and acceptable use of sexuality is when its vague reminder is used to sell us garbage like beer and trucks or whatever.

      Even the majority of art and artist pretend sexuality is not part of art, unless it’s rape.

      • orcrist@lemm.ee
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        3 months ago

        I don’t know what culture you live in, but I think your description of what’s embraced by modern culture is at odds with what we see on TV, on Netflix, on YouTube, in magazines, in books, talked about by people everyday.

        What is it specifically that you wish you could find that’s not available, that you feel ought to be appropriate but isn’t, somehow? I’m struggling to figure this one out.

        • interdimensionalmeme@lemmy.ml
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          3 months ago

          I’m not sure where you are seeing any of that on those platforms. Except as bait or advertising, I see no genuine expression of sexuality and in fact it is explicitely banned on almost all platforms that only pornography depicts it honestly and I mean “honestly” because the vast majority of it is of course fake and vulgar commercial trash.

          You can see it with the hot tub twitch stream. The repression is so intense that these little gimmick are the bleeding edge of “showing some midriff in a bikini”. That’s the state of the discourse for the most extreme elements of culture and beyond that is just an empty meaningless desert.

    • Asherah@lemmy.world
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      3 months ago

      I think the issue is, when reveling in your sexuality, everyone involved must consent. It’s hard to say whether posting pics of you in revealing clothes is consent for old men to ogle or not. I’d say if you post it publicly, then it should be fine for said old men to respectfully ogle. But if said old men decide to comment something like, “would love to squirtle on those jigglypuffs” on the revealing image, we’re suddenly entering nonconsensual territory. So there’s a fine line and it’s easy to cross. Simply loving looking at boobs on the internet is fine; many women enjoy being admired. But if you take it any further, that’s when problems arise. Enjoy your sexuality responsibly, my friends. 💕

      Edit: it’s both extremely telling and extremely concerning how much my rational take on consent is triggering all these pathetic men.

      • A_Random_Idiot@lemmy.world
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        3 months ago

        If you don’t want people spreading your images, wanking to your images, making crude comment about your images, oogling your images, etc etc. And I don’t mean just nudes, I mean any picture you post…

        Then don’t post them online.

        because once they hit the internet, in any capacity, you’ve lost all control of them, forever. They will still be there to be discovered when you are lying in a nursing home at 104 years old, Your descendants so far removed that they dont even know your name will still be at risk of stumbling upon them. People on the other side of the planet might use it in advertising or virtual sex dolls without you ever knowing.

        You might not like it, you might not want it, you might not consent to it, but its still going to happen.

        And if you want it to not happen, don’t post things online. Because not posting is the only control you’ll ever be able to exert over them.

        • Asherah@lemmy.world
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          3 months ago

          Whatever you say, really don’t care. I don’t need some rando to tell me shit I already know.

          • A_Random_Idiot@lemmy.world
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            3 months ago

            “I don’t care what some rando has to say, now let me go back to posting on the site full of randos talking to eachother. BUT THEY BETTER NOT REPLY TO ME!”

            • Asherah@lemmy.world
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              3 months ago

              Sorry, I should have said I don’t care to be mansplained about basic shit about how posting things on the internet works. You guys are really fucking obnoxious, it’s telling how badly my comment about consent set you all off.

              • A_Random_Idiot@lemmy.world
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                3 months ago

                Yes. your comment set me off so much that I made a calm, rational response about the dangers of posting online and the lack of control you have over it.

                God, someone stop me. Won’t someone think of the children?

                • Asherah@lemmy.world
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                  3 months ago

                  You regurgitated what a million other jerk ass men already said. I get it. Things on the internet are there forever, it’s all the women’s fault for posting revealing pics, I mean they were asking for it with the way they were dressed, huh?

                  • A_Random_Idiot@lemmy.world
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                    3 months ago

                    Yes yes.

                    Everyone is the enemy, even if they’ve no hate or hostility, and have provided nothing but calm and rational discourse… you won’t let that stop you from imagining what they said, so you can be upset about that instead.

                    Because you must justify being an obnoxious ass about everything, and to everyone, to try and artificially elevate respectful discourse into screaming and skreeeeee-ing, because its the only way you can sustain your perpetual victim complex to justify yourself. Its why you do abhorrent shit like equate basic internet safety that an alarming majority of people don’t know or realize in this day and age to rape. Because using rape in this way is a great way to provoke all sorts of responses that you can self-victimize yourself with, over and over again, to wallow in your euphoria of imagined persecution.

              • GiveMemes@jlai.lu
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                3 months ago

                I’ve literally been sexually assaulted and you set me off too. Maybe you’re just a fucking dumbass

                • Asherah@lemmy.world
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                  3 months ago

                  Well, as someone who’s been through it, I’d really hope you of all people would understand the fucking importance of consent.

                  • GiveMemes@jlai.lu
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                    3 months ago

                    I also understand consequences for actions. If it was a private insta page, that’s one thing, and I don’t necessarily support these men’s actions nor would I take them myself, insofar as the thirsty comments, but if I posted a picture of myself that was purposefully sexy publicly, those are the comments I have to be prepared to get. I really don’t think your argument holds weight, as the consent is done when they post the image publicly to a place with public comments. That was the choice they made. I think that if somebody’s pictures are leaked or something, that’s totally different, but just insofar as public forums… yeah no

                  • GiveMemes@jlai.lu
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                    3 months ago

                    I’d also really think somebody that cares about people wouldn’t throw somebody’s trauma in their face, fwiw

      • redisdead@lemmy.world
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        3 months ago

        If you show your tits to the internet on an open platform anyone can leave comments on, you automatically consent to people looking at your tits and commenting on them.

        Until that platform specifically restricts the types of comments you don’t like, all you can do is suck it up, buttercup.

        • Asherah@lemmy.world
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          3 months ago

          So do you get off on being an ass or is it just something that naturally happens?

          • redisdead@lemmy.world
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            3 months ago

            If someone climbs on a soapbox to spout racist shit, you wouldn’t have any problem with random people heckling them.

            It’s the same with showing your tits online.

            If you don’t want to attract creepy comments, don’t do stuff that attracts creepy people.

      • Affidavit@lemm.ee
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        3 months ago

        Edit: it’s both extremely telling and extremely concerning how much my rational take on consent is triggering all these pathetic men.

        Your initial comment was rational, it was well-thought out and you made a fair point while ending the comment on a positive note. Left alone, I would have upvoted your well-considered opinion and moved on.

        However, your follow up responses and your edit were unprovoked ad hominem sexist attacks where you assume everyone who disagrees is a mansplaining penis-wielder whose words have less value than your own. While having your views challenged can be confronting, responding in the manner you are only detracts from your argument.

        • petrol_sniff_king@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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          3 months ago

          But if said old men decide to comment something like, “would love to squirtle on those jigglypuffs” on the revealing image, we’re suddenly entering nonconsensual territory.

          I would love to know which women are set off by this.

      • Jeanschyso@lemmy.world
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        3 months ago

        Put something on a public platform = accept that people will look at it. Allow for people to comment on it and you invite these comments. If someone wants to post pictures and not get comments on them, they can post them to a platform that doesn’t allow comments.

        • petrol_sniff_king@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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          3 months ago

          That’s right! Exactly.

          For instance, this is public, and if a bunch of random weirdos came in here and started saying things like “whoa, who let the monkey out of his cage?” or “I’m about to put something on his public platform = 1,000 unsolicited dicks,” there’s absolutely nothing you, or I, can do about that—and it would be wrong to do anything, of course!

          You’re cool, man, you get it.

    • linearchaos@lemmy.world
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      3 months ago

      There are a non-insignificant number of people in society who can’t seem to handle the concept of consent. Then we have an ever growing number of incels awkward enough in relationships and socially that they can’t talk about sexual topics without becoming angry and violent.

      A lot of our societal taboos about sexuality are trying to keep those people at bay.

      It’s a mental health problem to be sure and it needs to be handled in society but it is rarely actually worked that way. It’s easier in some countries to make women hide away than it is too deal with the men that are out of control.

      We really as a race can’t revel in our sexuality until we manage to get our morality under control.

      • GiveMemes@jlai.lu
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        3 months ago

        You’re treating the symptoms as the causes dude. If we had more open discussion about these things I don’t think such issues would be as commonplace.

        If people understood more of what victims of rape go through, they’re much less likely to view consent as a hazy line.

        I go to many places where sexuality is celebrated rather than shamed and because of that it’s much less of a big deal. At one music festival I went to there were coed communal showers. I was kind of nervous but I headed down. Got in there and everybody was laughing and singing, sudsing each other up with soap, etc. This wasn’t because it was some kind of huge orgy, but rather that everybody was comfortable with the nudity and we were having fun together in a totally non sexual way, in my opinion only made possible by the openness everybody had about sexuality there.

        We are sexual creatures (except ace people), ain’t no two ways about it. Keeping sex taboo does nothing to prevent the problems you’re describing. It’s like the Islamic extremists who think the only way to protect women is by taking away their rights, making their beauty a taboo, etc. And still, these places have their own problems with rape anyway, so clearly that doesn’t work.

          • GiveMemes@jlai.lu
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            3 months ago

            I think the reason people may be downvoting you is that this comment has no reason as to why you disagree. I have not btw. I respect disagreement

            • linearchaos@lemmy.world
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              3 months ago

              Yes, those two whole downvotes really make me lose sleep.

              I don’t really want to get into it because I can see from your replay that you won’t be arguing in good faith, but we’ll give it one go. If you start moving the goal posts, changing the subject or cherry picking I’ll just block you. Defend what you claim in whole or dispute what I say in whole with non-fallcy fact. If you want to argue, we can debate it, but I’m not going to have your cheesing it.

              Everything I mentioned is an observation of what humanity does. It’s objective, there is sufficient documentation if it happening in court cases and search fodder. Most of your post is opinion about how you feel in your circumstances and poorly thought out enough that I felt it’s better written off than addressed, but let’s give it a shot.

              “You’re treating the symptoms as the causes dude.” this is your opinion, you only offer more opinion to back it up. I disagree, cause and effect are sometimes hard to peel apart. You give a starving person bread. You don’t give a rapist access to women talking about sex. Giving a rapist free and open access to women isn’t going to cure him. (my opinion, free to debate)

              “If people understood more” is an opinion and unfounded. Do you have proof for that? I disagree

              "I go to many places where " fallacy, your experience isn’t everyone’s experience. Same goes for your communal showers. How many cases of gang rape and murder happen? Just because communal shows and bathrooms can exist in some places with some people, doesn’t mean that it’s good for everyone everywhere. (my opinion, free to debate)

              "We are sexual creatures (except ace people), ain’t no two ways about it. " this does not support your statement that we should be more open sexually. Just because we replicate sexually does not mean society in whole can handle it. Evolution provided us reproduction, rape and misogyny, cultural enlightenment made those things bad and wrong. We are all enlightened equally and going back to the stone age to have more open sex isn’t going to improve that. We can return to it perhaps once we move along socially, but right now, it’s just a horror show waiting to happen.

              “Keeping sex taboo does nothing to prevent the problems” then why separate pedo’s from children? We do it because it works, we do it because if we don’t bad things happen.

              “It’s like the Islamic extremists who think the only way to protect women is by taking away their rights, making their beauty a taboo, etc. And still, these places have their own problems with rape anyway, so clearly that doesn’t work.” - you insinuate it can’t be worse without any proof that it makes it better. Because there is a theft in a neighborhood, one can’t say the police and laws are useless.

              It’s a mental health problem to be sure and it needs to be handled in society

              In my opinion, this is the answer, and just being more sexual is not going to do anything but get a lot of people hurt.

              • GiveMemes@jlai.lu
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                3 months ago

                I think it’s hilarious how you accuse me of arguing in bad faith then purposely misrepresent my argument to make yours look better not even 10 sentences later. I have benn writing a reply to this comment and I really hope you read it when I finish.

    • dullbananas (Joseph Silva)@lemmy.ca
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      3 months ago

      After I quit porn, I became more sensitive to the minds and souls of women, and now my sexual attraction can flow to a desire for the women being happy.

      This may seem counterintuitive if you have an addiction involving lust, but I am now more completely reveling in my sexuality.